Some days have passed since writing here. Not a lot of changes. I’ve read some of the news and honestly getting tired of the bad graphs and charts. Can someone post a good one? Like how many people have beaten covid-19 worldwide? Here in Vietnam we have about 60 some active cases. Over 200 people have beaten it. Why do we not see those statistics? Worldwide? It would be nice perhaps once in awhile to see something positive. Just my take. In any case I’m kinda graphed and charted out. The human cost in those charts does not seem at all transparent. It’s hundreds of thousands of numbers. Perhaps it’s like my graduate professor in statistics once remarked,
does the difference make a difference
I don’t know. I’m just an experiment of one old retired guy. Somewhat egotistic and narcissistic with no redeeming quality. So be it.
I also see two ways I could deal with this. I dropped one of them.
Dream about tomorrow. It does not work. Who knows what it brings?
Live for today. I can do this. Here in Hanoi. Yes.
But there’s another thing with either. For my own little sanity I decided awhile ago to practice a little meditation. I sometimes want to quiet the nagging voice with its worried cadence and concern about tomorrow. Frankly there is nothing I can really do about tomorrow. No amount of planning which I hate. Scheduling which I despise. Responsibilities I ignore. None work. I gave them all up when I retired.
So I’m left with today. Moments of today. Less numbers of mind numbing charts and graphs that boil down human misery to numbers on gradually inclining graphs. I cannot march to their drumbeats. If you can kudos. I need moments of silence and release. Then I can perhaps see another one. Or maybe not. I’m just fucking human.