We had this discussion somewhere about remembering our Dads. Perhaps on Facebook when my friend Vikk posted a wonderful article on the things she most remembers about her Dad. It caused me to think about my dad and then being a dad to two wonderful and unique people.
I was so young when he left after World War II and Korea but there are these memories which I have written about which seem stuck in the synapses. My mom would tell me the stories too. They would meet after World War II in Japan. The story is after meeting my mom, my dad said,
I will marry that woman one day soon
And he did. Then he was sick and retired from the Army. Perhaps a hero of the war but always my hero. He took me fishing from a bridge and we would sit at the bridge. Him with a cold beer and the fishing pole dangling to the water. He would look at me with those warm and cool eyes and smile and let me sip his beer. We never caught any fish because the fishing was not real. I would find out there was no hook on the line just a string tied to the pole because he could not stand to hurt things after the war. My mom would pretend to get mad about him sharing the beer. He would say,
now hon. Mike just needs a touch
And he touched me so many times and then he left but the stories my mom would tell me of her only love would enrich each moment and I felt for years when I made a decision or faced a challenge he would be there. Maybe pointing a direction or focus out to me. I often would go the other way because I realized it was my life but the wonder of having him somewhere silently telling me to consider both paths stuck with me.
So soon gone though. So soon.
Being a dad
Now the time has transfused and I am a dad twice over. I have two wonderful people that have achieved adulthood but my ex-wife and their mom may have some doubts. Its okay though because their measure of being adult will never match up to hers. And my daughter would sit with me and I would share my beer. Their mom would pretend to get mad and hold her smile and I realized it all was the same. Perhaps like a Harry Chapin song. Nothing changed but everything did.
When I had a dad and became a dad.